THE BEST POLICY

I’ve only just discovered that they’ve made a new version of Roots. Not that I’ll be watching it; I saw the original and it was a load of racist claptrap. It was just pandering to the PC brigade and white-haters out there. Roots II was even worse, glorifying terrorists like Martin Luther King and Malcolm X. I’m sure there were even bits in it featuring the Black Panthers. Such blatant anti-white racism shouldn’t be allowed and shame on the BBC for showing it!

In case you think I’ve gone all Tommy Robinson on you, I’m just echoing the sentiments of the Vanguard Bears. Hector happened to mention them, so I went over for a peek – and, Jesus Christ, the cunts are absolutely mental! They’re trying to get some guy sacked for chanting “The Huns are going bust” more than six years ago. Maybe they could explain why that’s anti-Protestant. I know they always insist that ‘Huns’ means ‘Protestants’, so who do they believe was ‘going bust’? Was the Church of Scotland in financial straits? Or the Free Church? Or maybe it was the Church of the Blessed Dinosaur in Northern Ireland.

The Green Brigade, meanwhile, are a bunch of terrorist supporters, apparently, and Call It Out is just an excuse for anti-Protestant rallies. Where the fuck do they get all this shite? The frightening thing is, though, that The Peeppul believe every word of it. Why? Well, if you’ll pardon another shameless plug, you can find out in my book The People. You’ll discover how, after the Reformation, they were at the bottom of the heap and it was all downhill after that. They were bred to be thick and violent and, by God, was that a successful venture!

Steve Gerrard, meanwhile, is getting a bit carried away with himself. He says of tonight’s match at Easter Road, “We all know this is their manager Neil Lennon’s big fixture”. How the hell does he make that one out? Talk about big-headed! So, beating Celtic was no big deal; it’s playing against Neo-Gers that counts. Oh, right, they’re at the top of the table at the moment, but somebody needs to tell Gerrard that the season doesn’t finish until May. They’ve won nothing and they still are nothing. And Neil Lennon knows that as well.

The Peeppul themselves seem to be split over the racism of their good friends, fellow bigots and favourite scapegoats, Chelsea supporters. Most of them think that the whole thing is a ‘witch hunt’, especially the guy being accused of racism against Raheem Sterling. This comment sums up how they feel:

“Nope, trial by social media has declared him guilty.

Not defending the guy if he is guilty btw but he deserves to be innocent until guilty like everyone else.”

They’re all banging on about lack of evidence etc. Strange how they never felt that way about Aleksandar Tonev.

Have you seen this: https://www.rangersprotect.co.uk/life-insurance/? You can take out different policies and, apparently, help your club at the same time. Now, what I’d want to know is, who’s underwriting this enterprise? The website says, “Rangers Protect is a trading name of Saveonlife.co.uk Limited which is an appointed representative of Lifetime Protection Services Limited”. Google Saveonlife and Lifetime Protection Services and you’ll find that both of them are brokers, linking folk up with established insurance firms.

That still leaves the question of who is underwriting the Neo-Gers policies. Is it Honest Dave or the Neo-Gers board? Who the hell would be stupid enough to sign up? Well, stupid is practically a synonym for The Peeppul. You just know that they’d never pay out, even if you die. They’ll just give somebody else your name and claim you’re still alive; your spouse and kids will get bugger all. Either that or Gerrard will get handed all the cash in January, leaving only enough for one payout. The whole thing will end up as a tontine!

I remember reading somewhere that Eric Blair (George Orwell) once said that the worst thing about being a socialist was some of the folk that were on your side. It’s the same when you support Scottish independence; there are some absolute cunts out there on the independence side. One of them was responding to some guy that bemoaned the ‘faux’ Scots being peddled to school kids. I’m sure you’re aware of my opinion on this and decided to back the guy up. Cue the outrage. Apparently, the Scots that Robert Burns spoke was ‘beaten out of’ children at school, where they were made to learn Standard English. So, how come we don’t all speak Standard English?

I pointed to those ridiculous ‘Itchycoo’ books, with their centuries-old, Rabbie Burns style of language. Nobody speaks like that, so what’s the point? One clown said that the point was that the children will pick up those old words and end up speaking ‘proper’ Scots again. He couldn’t see the irony in this. He was arguing that Scots had disappeared because kids had been ‘forced’ to speak Standard English. Obviously, he has no idea how working-class, Scottish people speak, but wants to force his version of how they should speak onto them. What a fucking tit!

I was speaking to the seven-year-old daughter of my daughter’s partner the other night. (I don’t know what you’d call her – my step granddaughter?) She was in stitches when I was telling her about when I was ten and was at the swimming pool in Kay Street in Springburn. We were suddenly alerted by all the so-called lifeguards to get out the pool. There were screams and yells and rumours of crocodiles and piranhas as we scrambled out of the water. It turned out that it was worse than any aquatic predator – it was a huge shite! The underside of the shite was bleached white, making it look even more sinister. One of the ‘lifeguards’ fetched a long, wooden pole with what looked like a wok on the end and scooped the shite out of the water. We were then told we could go back in, but none of us did. As far as we were concerned, it was no longer water but jobby soup!

As you can imagine, such a story is hilarious to a seven-year-old, but there’s a serious side to consider. Nowadays, the pool would have to be closed so that it could be thoroughly cleaned. That kind of law is thanks to the EU. Now that the UK is leaving, will we be going back to the old ways? And with the serious lack of money, there’ll be nobody to scoop the shite out. Going to a swimming pool will be a case of taking your life in your hands as you swim through raw sewage. The only answer is Scottish independence. Unfortunately, some folk seem to think that means we all need to speak like Robert Burns!

And, apparently, everything is going to be so bad after Brexit that the Government is getting the troops prepared to do battle in the streets. I don’t know if they’re expecting a revolution or what. The more likely scenario is that they’re expecting a bit of backlash about that backstop business. The army is already in training to fight with hordes of dinosaurs as the DUP storm Westminster with squadrons of tyrannosaurs and velociraptors. The navy’s battleships are doing manoeuvres in the North Channel, preparing for shoals of ichthyosaurs, while the RAF is getting ready for a new Battle of Britain against flocks of pterodactyls. General Gregory Campbell, meanwhile, is in the fuhrerbunker, pushing plastic models of prehistoric monsters over a map of Britain. It’s going to be the war to end all wars!

“veni, vidi, vici.”

That’s the paperback version of The People available. You can get it here. As usual, Amazon takes ages to realise that this paperback is the same book as the Kindle version, so they’re on separate pages. The Kindle version is here.

The perfect Christmas gift!

“Awright, troops? Naw, it’s no’ ‘The perfect Christmas gift’. Don’t buy any-y this liar’s fuckin’ books, unless it’s tae pit oan a bonefire. If ye waant the true story an’ a stockin’-filler that every cunt wid like, Ah suggest ye look here.

 

28 thoughts on “THE BEST POLICY

  1. Ordered the book.

    As for revolutions, does anybody have blueprints of the houses of parliament? and know where I can get barrels of gunpowder and a wheelbarrow? I have matches.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. It must be the Winter solstice or some other rare event as SFM have a new post up for the faithful to read . Well not that new as Aulheid has reheated a post from another site that was posted in 2012 with a trip down memory lane about playing football in the streets as a kid . This about sums up this site and should consider a name change again but the best ones like All Our Yesterdays and the History Channel are already in use so for now they are stuck with the Sevco Football Monitor . Back in the good old days there was a theory that uber trolls like Steerpike etc were part of a concerted PR campaign to thwart the forensic efforts of sites like TSFM as it was then . Given what a dead end it has become no PR company would bother so the truth of the matter is the trolls are just sad little people with too much time on their hands . JJ for all his faults can at least spouut pish on subjects other than Oldco/newco and frequently does but still not worth paying for . Bring back Leggo .

    Like

  3. Bang on form Pat, the jobby story had me in stitches and reminded me of the days we went to school with no underwear as we just didn’t have any. Whne it was time for PE we always had a excuse, verucas were a favourite when we had swimming.

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  4. Remember Kay street baths well, after a swim a cup of noodle soup from machine then a roll and fritter from the chip shop just before Springburn road ,,they where the days

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  5. Thanks Pat enjoyable read,I was beginning to think you’d had a personality transplant after that first paragraph,thankfully it was tongue in cheek.
    From what I’ve seen sg is defo at the right club,what he doesn’t know is endless,or he just makes up as he goes,TWAT.
    I am enjoying your latest it had me a wee bit bamboozled as I thought you were going to tear them a new one but your truly trying to understand the way of the hun.Thats an undertaking that could have serious consequences on your mental health as I do not think they even understand themselves.
    The vocabulary in it had me highlighting and searching for their definitions.
    Very enjoyable read,I’ve only managed an hour so far looking forward to the remainder.
    HH🍀

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Three points in the bag and a couple of the youngsters getting a goal each so a job well done . Perhaps some of the bed wetters in our support will now calm down a bit . The huns also dropped points but according to a friend are still going to win the league as they managed a draw while we were beaten by Hibs so the league is as good as won . Orc logic you gotta love it .

    Liked by 2 people

  7. Well just finished The People and it was not what I expected from the cover . The great thing about reading it on Kindle is when Pat uses a big word I dont understand I just tap it on the screen and the tablet looks it up . The number of references shows what a lot of work has gone into the book and again the beauty of Kindle is just tap the link and you can read them as you work through the book . I am sure it will not make it onto the best sellers list in Mordor unless it is published as an audio book as your average orc struggles to read as concentrating on anything for any length of time causes their bowels to move and they mess themselves . A good read and with a bit of luck Monti will get his wife to read it to him . Anyway off to read JJ’s book . If anyone can spot the flaw in this plan get in touch .

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Oh Dear.
    I think that The Fair Christina has deserted us to hold Court on the E’tims Blog.

    Just like Trump & Brexit being foisted on the Gullible on both sides of “ The Pond “ due to the nefarious activities of a third party ( think Putin ). It seems that our Budding Blogger ( try saying that after a drink or twa 🥃 🍺🍺) has been driven out by our “ own “ ( Pun intended ) lurking plastic hun Mr Mullions.

    His shellfish 🦞 pursuit of our fair poster has left nothing but a 🐟y smell on our site that has driven her to explore oyster horizons .

    My message is, come back Cristina. Don’t let the 🐂y win. We’ ll support you, 🎼 we’ ll support you evermore …. 🎵🎶 . You get the drift.

    And Owen, cease and desist you Ranker. Your club’s deid mate. GIRFUY.😂🤪🤣

    H.H.

    😎🤓😎
    🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿
    ☘️☘️☘️

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Don’t blame me Jimboh, wi’ aw the crap she’s writin’ oan Etims she must be efter Keech Jackson’s jobby. Ah think bein’ oan a turd rate site like that his took a toallie her mind – that’s ma faeces anywye.💩💩💩

      Liked by 3 people

      1. RIGHT!! For the avoidance of doubt I have not gone anywhere! If you look on Etims you will see I have only posted once in last seven days!! Tis the festive season guys, your lives carry on with very little interruption, except for maybe some taxi duties re shopping expeditions. I, and the rest of the female population, am making sure Christmas dinner is all you’re expecting it to be, making sure all presents are wrapped and tagged, making sure all the Christmas tip & cards are made up for the postman, the window cleaner, the paper boy, the Chinese takeaway guy etc etc, writing and sending cards, putting up tree & deccies and giving the house a thorough clean up!! So my little treats of reading and commenting on blogs has had to take a back seat!! Now you’ve made me give you all a row when I meant to come on for a catch up 😂😂😂

        Liked by 4 people

        1. Excuses, excuses just like a wuman. See youze men yer bloody useless. yeez dae bugger all aboot the house and still expect me to keep the house runnin and mop yer fevered brow during yer man flu and male menopause. An youse have goat the brass to expect yer marital doings as well. Yeeze are ontae plums.

          Is that what you really meant to say?,

          So are you all set fur the Bells anaw then?

          H.H

          JimboH

          Liked by 1 person

        2. Hello stranger, Ah’ve rotten a poem tae welcome ye back (poor man’s Parsley ma arse Jimboh)

          Ma eyeballs ur rid
          Ma nose it is blue
          If Ah buy two fish suppers
          Kin Ah gie wan tae you?

          Liked by 4 people

  9. Madman

    Didn’t know what time it was
    But the lights were low..ow..ow
    I tuned to Sportsound on the radio..oh..oh
    Some EBT cheats there were ‘bigging up’ Sevco

    A loud voice told me that:’The league is as good as won’
    ‘Did ye no’ read it in the Record and the Sun?”
    Hey, that ain’t no pundit, that’s some crazy toxic Hun!

    There’s a madman standing at my side
    He’s shouting ‘we’re stull Raynjurz!’
    And ‘we’re gaun fur 55’
    There’s a madman standing at my side
    I told him they would blow it
    That his rancid club had died
    I told him: ‘Are the Peepul too sick?’
    ‘Are the Peepul too thick?’
    ‘Are all the Peepul stupid?’

    ‘King had to con someone so he picked on you..ou..ou’
    ‘Thick as two planks with a miniscule IQ’
    ‘Check in your wallet, has he left some cash for you?’

    ‘Look on the pitch there, can’t you see they’re shi..i..ite?’
    ‘You still think Stevie is the man to put things right?’
    ‘Don’t pass the madhouse or they’ll have you locked up on sight!’

    There’s a madman standing at my side
    He’s shouting ‘we’re stull Raynjurz!’
    And ‘we’re gaun fur 55’
    There’s a madman standing at my side
    I told him they would blow it
    That his rancid club had died
    I told him: ‘Are the Peepul too sick?’
    ‘Are the Peepul too thick?’
    ‘Are all the Peepul stupid?’

    Liked by 7 people

    1. Hope you don’t mind Arsene but I’’ve set your Madman composition to the original Starman 🎸chords and will do it as a Xmas party piece.
      Likeminded Celtic & Bowie fans with a few mandatory Hun 🧟‍♂️🧟‍♀️🧟‍♂️ In-laws.
      Should be fun.

      H.H

      Jimboh

      😎🤓😎
      🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿
      ☘️☘️☘️

      Liked by 2 people

          1. Please don’t Owen. God knows it might be catching. Then whit would all us timmigrants larf aboot

            In saying that you’re the only intellectually challenged muppet frae Mordor I’ve come across that does have enough grey matter between the compacted earwax to Really get it.
            You can take consolation in the fact that your offspring will be Tims. ( Nationalists, Indigenous, Clean and Educated. NICE).

            H.H

            JimboH

            Liked by 1 person

    2. Excellent Arsene,and aw they Gunners fans said ye wir done,WTF dae they know.
      I hope you are keeping well and are all set for ‘The Holidays’
      That’s a wee Crimbo present that wiz very well received TYVM Mr.Parsley
      First Class PLEASE DON’T EVER STOP.
      HH🍀💚✅🇮🇪😂🤣☮️

      Liked by 1 person

        1. Noo Arsene you know that isn’t true,there’s plenty more besides me that truly appreciate your prose.I’m only glad you are well enough to spoil us wae a Christmas ditty.Appreciate the dedication,where’s Roy Castle hiding those days?
          Sure,according tae him that’s aw We need,I never knew there was water,minerals and vitamins in dedication😂🤣
          I sincerely hope you make a total recovery from whatever was ailing you,your talent is undeniable and should be spread far and wide.I’ve emailed all of your poems to my brother who is also a wordsmith,but he is busy at his stall right up until Christmas Eve.I shall be sure to relay his opinion to you.
          For now though,please look after yourself and I hope the holidays are both enjoyable and restorative.
          HH🍀
          Good game today,those goalposts @CP must be made of strong stuff,they took a pelting again,CHEERS Arsene….YNWA💚☮️🤣😂

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        2. Arsene I’m hurt – how could you say such a thing 😂😂😂 I always comment and compliment on your verses! Bit behind on my posting due to Christmas duties (you know the stuff all your womenfolk are doing while you guys are messing about on the computer 😂😂) but I would have caught up *sniff sniff* anyways – brilliant as always 😀

          Liked by 4 people

  10. Nice to see a member of the fairer sex back on the blog and nice to see our poet back and on good form . Was in Oban today and got a haircut so saw some of the gutter press tabloids and the Oban Times seemed more popular than the Hun and the Record . Three goals and three more points and the youngsters doing well so godd stuff .

    Liked by 2 people

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