I remember at a primary school in Glasgow when there was a ‘Wet Play’, the Primary 3 class I was in charge of had their customary trip to the toilet, three at a time so there wouldn’t be any carry on. There was a right racket coming from the boys’ toilet so I went to investigate. Inside one of the cubicles, a boy was standing on top of the cistern, shouting abuse at the boys from another class. He saw me and immediately jumped down, bringing the lid of the cistern with him. The lid hit the toilet, taking a chunk off before landing, in two pieces on the floor. I couldn’t believe the gall of the little cunt when he said, “That wisnae me!”
He twisted his ankle when he jumped and his mother was all for suing the school for putting him in danger. I heard from another parent that she did, in fact, see a lawyer, who asked her a simple question. “How do you stop him from climbing onto the cistern at home?” Her answer was, “Ay knows no’ tae dae that!” She was laughed out the door.
And that’s the reason why children aren’t allowed to do the things we used to do in the ‘good old days’. It’s got nothing to do with ‘PC gone mad’ or the like; it’s that parents can never accept that their little darlings are to blame for anything. Even a simple game of conkers could end up in a lawsuit if one child accidentally gets hit on the hand. It’s council lawyers that insist that such games are banned and every school visit has to have a risk assessment before taking place. You can’t even let the kids inside early if it’s pishing down outside in case somebody slips and falls. The councils’ insurance only covers schools during school hours, so if you open the doors beforehand, you’re setting the council up for a lawsuit. Even simple things like putting a plaster on a cut are strictly regulated.
The way The Peeppul are blaming Kilmarnock for the collapse of that disabled shelter is exactly the same. The whole idea behind the shelter is to keep the rain off the folk inside. It’s not a bomb shelter, for fuck’s sake; the most it’s expected to cope with is a heavy hailstorm. It’s certainly not designed for fat Huns to dance on top of. The way the Huns are going on, either the shelter should be made of reinforced concrete or surrounded by spiked railings and barbed wire. And then, when one or two of the stupid cunts get their orange tops from Turkey all ripped, or their empty skulls impaled on the railings, they’ll be moaning about health and safety again.
The Peeppul refuse to heed the warning notices.
If the powers-that-be decide to act on what happened, you just know that they’ll not be able to find it in their hearts to blame The Peeppul. With the blame falling on Kilmarnock, it means that every football ground will have to look at its provision for the disabled. Not every club can afford reinforced shelters, so either disabled folk will have to sit right at the back, out of the way, or be banned altogether. This one’s going to be interesting. Of course, what the SFA and the SPFL might well do, which is standard procedure when it comes to the Huns, is simply pretend that it never happened.
The Peeppul, as usual, are putting the whole thing down to an agenda against their club. It’s all the Raynjurz-Haturz ganging up on them again. One moron on Twitter implied that Sportsound should have been discussing the shootings in America instead of the behaviour of The Peeppul at Rugby Park. Where do you even begin with that level of mental defectiveness? And, of course, they’re all demanding to know why nobody’s discussing those ‘offensive’ banners at Celtic Park!
Their main complaint about the GB banners is that the word ‘Fenian’ was on display, and yet they’re being condemned for singing about being up to their knees in Fenian blood. How fucking thick can you get! They’re the types that think because black Americans call themselves ‘Niggers’, then it’s okay for white supremacists to use the term. They obviously don’t understand irony, which is not exactly surprising since they’re just as cretinous as their racist cousins in the States. It’s not a matter of clutching at straws, but clutching at the few collective brain cells they have, desperately trying to make sense of the real world.
“…and I’ll hug him and squeeze him and call him Billy.”
Michael Stewart has brought up the subject of Strict Liability again, not realising that, in Scotland, it’s a complete non-starter. Rather than it being used to punish the Hunnish Hordes, you just know that it would be used to help their rancid team. Even if points were to be docked from Neo-Gers, the usual shite about ‘one side being as bad as the other’ would be trotted out to take the same number of points, or possibly more, from Celtic. There are too many Huns in the corridors of power to trust them with a weapon like that!
There also appear to be too many Huns on East Ayrshire Council as well, as they’ve decided to put all the blame on Kilmarnock FC as well. They’re saying that they’ve expressed concerns previously about the disabled shelter. They must have known that the Huns were going to be climbing on it. They’re also on about a ‘crush’ outside Rugby Park. Now, that’s a load of shite, there wasn’t any crush until that gate was opened and the Huns charged through. How the hell can that be Kilmarnock’s fault?
Meanwhile, the papers have all been carrying a picture of the polis, staunchly trying to repair the damage done by their fellow Huns. You’re bound to have seen it.
You’ll notice how heroic they all look, ready to protect and serve the poor, disabled folk that the evil Kilmarnock FC have put at risk. The picture reminds of something…oh, Aye…
You can just hear the singing now, “From the Halls of the Masonic Lodge, To the whores of Blythswood Square…”
There was a rather strange article in the Daily Record, reminding everyone of the hymns that used to be sung in primary-school assemblies. There was no rhyme nor reason for this piece; it came totally out of left-field. What is noticeable, though, is that hymns sung at assemblies at RC schools have been totally excluded. It might be argued that some of the hymns listed were sung in RC schools, but that was certainly not the case in the 60s and 70s. They list some of the ‘old favourites’ like All Things Bright and Beautiful, which is a distinctly Protestant song about everyone knowing their place. We never sang that at the three primary schools I attended. The DR would no doubt deny it, but it’s pretty obvious that the agenda behind the article is to let Catholics know that they’re other and they don’t belong.
One of my favourite memories of assembly hymns in the 60s was the one we always sang on the first school day in May. I never knew the name of the hymn, but a Google search threw up Queen of the May and The Lovely Month of May. We’d fight our way through a storm to get to school and turn up, hair all out of place, our balaclava helmets having been blown into a puddle or a tree somewhere, and our bare legs red raw with the freezing cold rain battering off them. After the register was taken, it was down to the assembly hall to sing, “The sun is shining brightly, the trees are clothed in green…” while the rain battered off the windows and any trees visible had been denuded of any trace of green by the wind. Aye, those were the days!
With yet another white supremacist in America getting his hands on a gun and murdering everybody in front of him, the official answer to this seems to be ‘more guns’. Republican commenters are saying that all mall security guards should be heavily armed. Christ, they won’t be happy until everybody’s got at least one gun on them. I read one piece on Twitter where somebody was explaining how it’s far easier to get a gun in America than it is to get an abortion. And yet the folk that go on about ‘Choose Life’ are the same ones that resist any moves toward gun control. It seems that only a foetus has the right to life; after you’re born, then you’re fair game for any nutjob with a gun.
Did you read about the guy that can’t get a passport because his surname is too rude? I read the start of the article and couldn’t figure out what the problem was. His name’s ‘Kennard’, which hardly lends itself to any kind of double-entendre. It turns out that he changed his name by Deed Poll to ‘Fu-Kennard’. He thought it would be a laugh. Well, you’re not Fu-Ken laughing now, are you? Prick.
The Daily Record has an article today, commiserating with those that didn’t do very well in their exams. The headline is, “What happens next if you did not get the exam results you wanted?” There’s no point in reading the piece; the answer is simple. You accept that you’re thick, go to the library, get somebody to help you to go online and sign up on this website.
Finally, I’ve seen appeals on Twitter from the folk, whoever they are, that run the Waverley paddle steamer. Apparently, the boat’s not been doing its usual runs doon the watter this summer and they’re looking for donations to help with repairs. I’ve been on the thing and it wasn’t cheap, so where has all the money gone? Maybe they’ve got debts to pay off. Just go bankrupt, stick it to the creditors and come back as the same company. Claim it was an Engine-Room Subsidiary! (Sorry!)
The Good Ship Sevco.
P.S. James Mc, I’ve never heard of Bedlay Street, Hyde Park Primary School or Auchintoshan Terrace. I lived in Springburn for five years but there were parts that were a complete mystery to me. I’d no idea what streets existed between St. Aloysius Annexe and St. Aloysius Church, or even what was up the hill from St. Aloysius Church. In fact, I knew nothing about what was behind that side of Springburn Road.
“Awright, troops? Iz usual, everybody’s tryin’ tae blame the Raynjurz supporters fur everyhin’. It’s no’ oor fault thit the Kilmarnock disabled bunker wisnae strong enough tae take the weight-y a couple-a young boays. It’s a fuckin’ insult tae oor disabled supporters tae shove thum intae some jerry-built gang hut. Ah bet they wheel the real shelter oot when they come callin’ it Rugby Park. An’ while thur aw gauin’ oan aboot oor supporters, they stull hivnae done anyhin’ aboot aw they spoon burners attackin’ an’ even murderin’ oor players it Hampden!”
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