I didn’t see Celtic’s game against AC Milan, but I see from all the moaners on Twitter that they didn’t play very well, at least in the first half. It doesn’t seem to have occurred to some of these geniuses that maybe Milan were just too good. Anyway, the big test is going to be against Aberdeen. If they fail that one, then I might just start panicking.
Meanwhile, Neo-Gers managed to beat Standard Liege through a penalty (surprise surprise) and a so-called ‘wonder goal’ by Kemar Roofe. The agnivores are all spunking themselves over this goal that was apparently scored from the half-way line. As I’ve said before, I don’t find this kind of goal impressive at all. Nine times out of ten such a ball would go straight over the crossbar, or miss the goal entirely; it’s only sheer luck that it’s gone into the back of the net. If the guy was doing this every other game, I’d be prepared to admit that it was deliberate and be suitably impressed. That’s unlikely, though, so, my opinion is that Neo-Gers rode their luck, as usual.
Football, however, pales into insignificance next to the disgusting decision by the Tories to vote down free school dinners for children in England during the holidays. Some folk have been calling their attitude ‘Victorian’, but even the fucking workhouses fed the kids during the holidays! And I see that Scottish Tories were all there voting against it as well. What happened to EVEL? This was only going to affect England, so why were these cunts allowed a vote? Yet, when it comes to the NHS, SNP MPs aren’t allowed to vote, even though if spending is reduced in England, the Barnett ‘Grant’ is reduced accordingly.
I’ve seen a few people moan that the tax payer shouldn’t be expected to pay for other folk’s children, yet I haven’t seen any of them complaining about the Royal Hausfrau being handed millions to bail her out because her investments have gone down. Meanwhile, billions are spent on a useless nuclear deterrent. Just who the fuck is it meant to deter? The Soviet Union is long gone, so who are they pointing at? There’s bombs going off and MPs being killed in the street, so they’re not doing much fucking good, are they? And they certainly haven’t deterred the Russians from getting involved, clandestinely, in British politics. A waste of fucking money, especially when there are children going hungry.
Wee Red Card Ross, only a couple of weeks ago, was banging on about all primary-school children getting free school meals, so how did he vote? The wee shitebag decided to abstain, so he can claim that he didn’t vote against the proposal. The very sight of that wee cunt is enough to turn anybody’s stomach. I don’t know what the hell’s wrong with the people of Moray voting the wee bastard in.
“D’yez honestly hink Ah gie a fuck aboot starvin’ weans? Ah kin get away wi’ sayin’ wull dae anyhin’ in Scotland, coz wur never gonny be in power there, ur wae? It’s no’ ma fawt thit they Labour wans doon in England decided tae throw a spanner in the works, tryin’ tae get Boris tae feed other cunts’ weans! Next hing ye know thull bae waantin’ tae gie haundoots tae aw the fuckin’ Gyppos!”
I was reading that the documentary about Princess Diana was alleging that she was conned, or even blackmailed, into that interview twenty-five years ago. Quite coincidentally, Martin Bashir, who conducted the interview back then, has come down with a bad case of Covid. It looks like there’s lessons to be learned from politicians after all.
“Hey, ya bastard! Ah’m iz sick iz a fuckin’ dog, so Ah um. Ah’m nearly iz sick iz Boris Johnson wiz!”
Pub and restaurant owners are kicking up fuck about having to close for another week. You’ve got to laugh when they state that all they’re concerned about is people’s jobs. One woman on Scotland Today was saying how her staff wouldn’t be able to pay their mortgages. Mortgages? On the paltry wages paid in the hospitality industry, how the fuck could anybody afford a mortgage? And then some posh student moaned about having to struggle if she couldn’t rely on her wages from the restaurant. I’m sure mummy and daddy would be able to help out. I’m a cynical old bastard these days!
Here, Hector, about The Damned. They were the first punk band to release a single, the first punk band to release an album and then split up in February 1978. They got back together with a new bassist in 1979. Ever since then they’ve split up and reformed multiple times with various line-ups. The news that they’ve got back together yet again isn’t exactly ground-breaking! The only constant over the years has been the lead singer, Dave Vanian. Now, if they replaced him, that would be news!
As for Johnny Rotten, he changes his mind about things every five minutes. He reminds me of Monti, who’ll say anything to wind folk up. (He’s currently doing a great job of it on Twitter.) I learned long ago not to listen to a word Lydon comes out with; he’s full of absolute shite.
I agree with AlecB. The SNP can put up a chimpanzee in a tutu that identifies as a lesbian orang-utan for a candidate and I’d still vote for them. The important thing is independence; everything else can be sorted out afterwards.
“Jist yous try soartin’ me oot, ya fuckers!”
On the home front, I recently had a bit of a run-in with a woman on Der Fuhrerhund’s walking route. We always pick up Der Fuhrerhund’s shite but on this particular day he dropped a liquid puddle of diarrhoea, which was impossible to lift. It was pishing down with rain, so it would get washed away soon enough. I got back up off the grass onto the path, when this harridan comes out her door, shouting, in a Yorkshire accent, “You didn’t pick oop yer dog’s shit!” I explained to her that it was too watery and went on to ask why she said nothing to the others whose dogs’ shite was everywhere. I ended by saying, “So, fuck off!” I haven’t seen her since.
She has a flag pole in her garden, flying a huge saltire, which didn’t really fit with her accent. I reckon she’s read all the shite in the Daily Mail about English folk being driven from their homes and thinks that by flying a Scottish flag she’ll keep the imaginary marauding Jocks at bay!
Finally, I’ve got a favour to ask. My books for children, especially the Skyscraper Rocket Ship series, have had zero readers in all these years. Anybody fancy reading free Kindle copies and putting reviews on Amazon? They don’t take long to read and you could probably get through all four in the one day.
“Awright, troops? It looks like Raynjurz urnae jist gonny win the league this season, but the Europa Cup an’ aw. Iz long iz thur’s no’ another plague comin’ doon the road tae let the corrupt SPFL haun’ theym another tainted title. An’ Ah’ve heard thit the Doop Party in Northern Ireland huv fun’ oot thit it’s the Kafflicks thit ur responsible fur this Covit hing, no the Chinese. Aw jist tae stoap Raynjurz winnin’ thur rightful place it the toap. Basturts!”
Details of all my books can be found here.
If you’re skint for any reason, drop me an e-mail and I’ll give you Kindle copies of any of my books. I don’t need any big explanations – just ask!