A bit of déjà vu about Neo-Gers’ marquee signing for next season. Bruno Alves is already boasting how he’s going to wrest the title from Celtic and, no doubt, some of the agnivores will be predicting that he becomes Player of the Year. It’ll end in tears, just like last year’s big signing. Bruno is […]

I remember once being outside with a P5/6 class. It was a nice day and I was following one of the lessons in the council’s P.E. handbook. The kids had to run while shouting at the top of their lungs. Every time they needed a breath they had to stop and then continue when they […]

Everybody seems to be looking for an apology these days. We’ve got Kezia Dugdale demanding one from Nicola Sturgeon because the fabled ‘Cybernats’ showered abuse on that woman claiming to use food banks. The liar deserved all she got. She lives in Stockbridge, which, if you don’t know Edinburgh, is an area where well-paid professionals, […]

The Peeppul are hurting big time at the moment. They’re desperate to play down Celtic’s achievement in going undefeated in the league but, as usual, end up just making an arse of themselves. Those with slightly more than the regulation one brain cell realise that if they’re going to disparage the Scottish Premiership, then any […]

There’s a seaside place in East Lothian called Longniddry, which has been in the papers on quite a few occasions. It’s notoriety is based on a car park near the beach, where people gather to indulge in dogging. (That meant skipping school in my day.) Couples have sex while others, mostly men I’d imagine, stand […]

Boxy has gone off his…er…box. He’s banging on about ‘cycles’ and Aberdeen coming to the end of one, while playing some fantasy league in his head, where Neo-Gers are only one point behind Celtic. It makes Kreosote Kenny’s complicated theory about the second half of the season seem intelligible by comparison. Where the hell does […]

I remember one school I worked at where the football team made it to the final of some Glasgow-wide competition. I had nothing at all to do with it; the head teacher organised the training and everything. Anyway, they were beaten in the final and, when handed their runners-up medals, they threw them away in […]

Education is a topic that’s pretty close to my heart, for obvious reasons. For years, everybody’s been moaning about the decline in literacy and numeracy skills; now it seems they’ve found the reason behind it. It’s all the fault of that pesky SNP! The story emerged yesterday of trainee teachers bemoaning the fact that they’re […]

Well, I’m through in Glasgow staying with my da, who shows no signs of being affected at all, apart from not being able to speak. He never joined in any of our Christmas games of charades, so he’s not had much practice with acting out what he wants. We usually get there eventually, but there […]